Sunday 13 February 2022

The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra

"Hide me in your humiliation." Valentine's Day, 2022. Since 2013, this day has been spent with a select screamo band to agonize alongside to, and this year is no different. Why would it be? As the old adage goes, misery loves company, and this is it. It's the best it'll get on a day like today.

The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra were a five-piece screamo/emoviolence band from Germany that were around from 2000 to 2004. Members of this band were also active in Resurrectionists and Republic Of Dreams. Their discography consists of a slew of splits with some incredible bands including La Quiete and Louise Cyphre. Their final release and only LP, Create The New is undoubtedly their magnum opus and definitely the essential release to listen to today. Sonically, they are incredibly chaotic, with grinding, discordant tremolo-picked chords and harshly screamed vocals, with only slight spots of melody between them. Fans of other German screamo bands like June Paik, Tristan Tzara, and splitmates Louise Cyphre will definitely love this, if such a feeling can even exist today. Don't enjoy.

1. In Love With A Switchblade
2. I'm Sorry That I Won't Join Your Breakfast Club But I'm On Expedition On Mars
3. Don't Worry! Be Happy! Written All Over His Corpse
4. I've Disguised Myself As A Hedgehog Infected With Rabies To Frighten All My Neighbors
5. Have You Heard Of Tyler Durden?
6. Question: Who Cut Your Hair? Answer: The Helicopter.
7. The Winner Of The Most Beautiful Star Award Owns Such Cute Pets
8. The Daily Newsflash: A Man Was Run Over By A Train. The Head Is Still Missing.
9. Misanthrophy Increasing With Every Good Thoughtful Shit

1. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Another Sheep Got Lost In The Brand New World
2. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - The Mystery Of Oxygen And Its Addiction To The Lungs
3. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Impressions Of Garlic Painted On Dead Skin And You
4. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - My Apollo Program Became A Big F***ing Mess
5. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Mrs. Cyphre Left This Note Written With Forcefed Realism
6. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - A Roadmap To An Ambiguous Lifeideal
7. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - About Surviving The Lie-Detector Without Even Begging Her To Whisper The Spell
8. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Dialogues Written Down Before The Marriage Between The Carcass And The Pathologist
9. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Oh Captain Oh Captain My Lifevest Exploded
10. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - We've Stopped The Cigarette Sharing Program Until…
11. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - The Symbolism Of Nightmares Betrayed By Deathbed Insomnia
12. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - It Has Become Famous Undo The Synonym COTA (Cancer Of The Apocalypse)
13. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - … (Previously Unreleased)
14.The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - #824224
15. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Moped Gang Or Die
16. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Bartender Give Me A Drink, I Don't Wanna Think
17. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - James Dean Is My Friend But He Has No Hand
18. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Mary Lou I Love You Too
19. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Kit Cad Club
20. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Thrill Of A Kill Is Not Birdseed
21. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Flies On Shit
22. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Catwalk
23. The Kinetic Crash Cooperation - Male Chauvinism

Note: This is the CD version with additional tracks released in 2003

1. We've Stopped The Cigarette Sharing Program Until...
2. The Symbolism Of Nightmares Betrayed By Deathbed Insomnia
3. It Has Become Famous Undo The Synonym C.O.T.A. Cancer Of The Apocalypse

1. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Miss Germany
2. Louise Cyphre - Et Cetera

1. Louise Cyphre - "Eh Bien, Mon Prince…"
2. Louise Cyphre - Quadratur Des Zirkels
3. Louise Cyphre - Ulbrich
4. Louise Cyphre - Ein/Aus Maschine
5. Louise Cyphre - Tabibuchua
6. Louise Cyphre - High Noon AM Abend
7. Louise Cyphre - Without Rhyme And Reason
8. Louise Cyphre - Shut Up!
9. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - My Old Friend Cancer
10. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - ...
11. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Robogirl, Roboboy And The Avenger Of Blood
12. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Zombie Lifetime Insurance
13. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - No28

1. La Quiete - Teorema Di Peters
2. La Quiete - Helas
3. La Quiete - Ai Bambini Occorre Educazione
4. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - "It's All I Can Do To You." Said The Bullet To The Head
5. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - This Time We All Know Who Is To Blame
6. The Apoplexy Twist Orchestra - Mr. Poe's "Tell-Tale Heart" Learned To Reinvent Itself?

1. Create The New (Part One)
2. A Sweet Case Of Mutilation
3. 40000 Miles And Counting
4. Vive La Tristesse
5. Hunted And Sold
6. Create The New (Part Two)
7. Exit
8. The 15 Minutes Attraction
9. I Believe In Suicide

A Travelling Bullet Stops In The Middle Of Its Journey To Have A Cigaret Break
The Love For Calves Simply Died Out Over The Centuries

Sunday 6 February 2022


Three were a four-piece post-hardcore band from Washington, DC that were around from 1986 to 1988. They were a Dischord band that consisted of some very notable members of other legendary bands from that era. Following the Egg Hunt project created by Ian MacKaye and Jeff Nelson (formerly of Minor Threat), they were joined by Gray Matter's Jeff Turner and Steve Niles. This was the first incarnation of Three, which only lasted a short while, with MacKaye going on to form Embrace and later Fugazi. Gray Matter's Mark Haggerty took his place as the band's guitarist. In typical Dischord tradition at the time, they only put out one album and it was posthumous. 1989's Dark Days Coming is a very underrated offering amidst a scene of incredibly revered projects. The band's melodic energy and penchant for catchy songwriting feels ahead of its time, coming just before the alternative rock boom of the 90's. The album originally consisted of 10 tracks, but has since been reissued by Dischord to include demo recordings, which is the version below. Enjoy.

1. Empathy
2. Swann Street
3. Buy Me A River
4. Domino Days
5. Dodger
6. International
7. Pious And Blood
8. Rejection
9. Dark Days Coming
10. Don't Walk Away
11. Shitberries Demo
12. Cheatin' Heart
13. Love Is Like A Rose
14. Food For Thog
15. Pretty/Heavy
16. Back And Forth
17. Hundred Aker Wood
18. Midnight Meat Train
19. Western Trashy One
20. Long Marching Song
21. Untitled